Posts Tagged ‘past’

This last decade has been eventful for me. It started off pretty badly if I’m honest. I wasn’t in a good place back then.

I spent New Year of 1999/2000 in a pub with some friends. I can remember what I wore, I still have the top somewhere stashed away! It was a very ordinary night, not as much fun as we used to have on a normal night out. I always think that there is too much expectation at new year. We used to have wild nights out but new years was always a let down. Drink prices are always ridiculous and you spend a fortune on a taxi home after waiting 3 hours for it in the first place!

This year we are staying at home. Katie will go to bed at the normal time and Anthony and I are having a meal of steak with herby new potatoes and veg followed by home-made lemon mousse. My sister and her friend might pop in at some point for a few drinks, that will be nice. We just want to spend this new year warm and safe with our nearest and dearest. It’s just a shame Robyn isn’t here to share it. She is at her “dads” until Saturday. That’s always been the deal… she goes there for new year and stays at home for Christmas. Out of the two events I know I get the better deal but I just hate having to share her 😦

I am entering the new decade with a family of my own. I am married to the man of my dreams and I have 2 wonderful daughters. I had nothing 10 years ago. Yes, I had my mum, dad, sister & nephew but I lived alone in a grotty flat. I was so so lonely and very miserable.
The “noughties” saw me have my children and get married. That makes the decade pretty momentous! It is the decade in which I grew into the person I am now. There’s lots I am glad to leave behind, glad to draw a line under. In 2005 I had what was teetering on the edge of a nervous breakdown. It scares me to think how poorly I was back then. I am very glad that I am not in that dark place anymore. In 2006 I had a miscarriage. That will always be in my mind but I am dealing with it better now. I wouldn’t have Katie if  I’d not suffered that miscarriage… I fell pregnant with her 8 weeks afterwards. Things happen for a reason. It’s all part of God’s plan. I believe that. It’s not always easy but time is a good healer.

So yeah, the last decade had great things and sad things. Inevitable I guess. Today I find myself really thinking about the past. I feel a bit weepy, people have come and gone, friends & family loved and lost.

What will the next 10 years hold… who knows?! Whatever happens it will be for a reason.

The hymn “Lord for the years” is one of my favourites. The words speak to me and give me comfort in times of both great joy and sorrow. I’d like to just share the last verse. It seems very fitting to quote it today as I always think it is about leaving behind the bad feeling, the luggage if you like. Leave all that behind and carry on regardless.

Lord for ourselves; in living power remake us-
self on the cross, and Christ upon the throne,
past put behind us, for the future take us:
Lord of our lives, to live for Christ alone.

I wish you all a very happy and prosperous 2010. May all your dreams come true xxx

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Ten on Tuesday…

Posted: 3 March 2009 in Ten on Tuesday
Tags: , , , , ,

Ten on Tuesday this week is “10 ways you can make your life better”.

  1. Laugh. I believe that laughter is one of the best medicines. Laughing is good for the soul.
  2. Live your own life. Don’t let anyone tell you who to be.
  3. Bake. Baking makes me happy. I get a huge sense of achievement when someone eats something I have made and declares it yummy.
  4. Nurture those close to you. For me it is my children. I believe I was born to be a mum. My job is to see my children grow up to be happy and fulfilled.
  5. Have a hobby. I have just discovered sewing and am realising that when I sew I am “Mel” again – not Mummy, not a wife, not a daughter… just Mel.
  6. Believe. I have a strong faith and at times that keeps me going. Everyone needs to believe in something, even if it’s the fairies at the bottom of the garden. Most importantly though believe in yourself.
  7. Learn from your past. Don’t repeat the mistakes but learn from them and use them to make your life better.
  8. Look to the future. It can be exciting if you let it!
  9. Don’t go to bed on an argument. It does nobody any good. Clear the air before you sleep.
  10. Regret nothing. You are who you are and you might just find people love you for it!