How healthy is your emotional bank balance?

School goes back next week. Part of me is sad and part of me is glad. I’m ready for some me time again but I will miss spending time with the girls and being carefree with time.

Robyn is really excited about seeing all of her friends again and Katie is more than ready to go back to nursery. She needs some space from me just as much as I need some space from her.
She has been particularly difficult this last week and we have seen the “old” Katie with tantrums galore along with her kicking and smacking me.

My dad popped round this morning and I was able to let off some steam about how difficult she had been from the moment she woke up. While he was here Katie sat very nicely watching TV and spoke very sweetly to me. I said to my dad that Katie had shot herself in the foot because now she is being all sweet and angelic the damage is already done. My patience had gone, I was in a bad mood with her and I couldn’t find it within myself to forget how horrid she had been beforehand.
I commented that this made me feel bad and then my dad said something that rang very true. He said “She has used up all of your emotional bank balance”.

He explained it like this:

When you have had lots of lovely times, lots of positive experiences and happy, carefree days then one bad day is ok. You can deal with it. When that emotional bank balance is in credit you can afford an off day.
However, when you have bad day after bad day and when things get you down constantly then the next bad day can be epic. When you are already in your emotional overdraft then the next bad day takes you over your agreed limit and you are in trouble.

The first few weeks of the holidays were lovely. My emotional bank balance was topped up and all was well. I could deal with the odd bad day with Katie because my account was in credit.
Now we are nearing the end my reserves are low. In order to top them up again I need to take some time out. Even 10 minutes sitting in my bedroom helps. It all keeps me away from that overdraft limit.

Make the most of good days while you can. Use them to top up your emotional bank balance and then when a bad day comes you will be ready. When you are suffering on that bad day remember that the debt will be repaid. Good times will come to top your account up.

How is your emotional bank balance at the moment? I’m still in my overdraft but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

The Incredible Hulk

That is what Katie sounds like right now. All week she has tested my patience to the limits. This morning I have reached breaking point.

The photograph below was taken yesterday when we took the girls along with my nephew and Robyns best friend to a country park. We intended on staying all afternoon but Katie ensured that we came home early after she did nothing but whinge unless she was doing precisely what SHE wanted to do. Maybe I should have let her run into the muddy bog or fall off a wobbly log into a huge patch of stinging nettles. Maybe I should have let her climb over the fence and into the water? Silly mummy should have conjured up some more bread to feed the ducks once we had used it all up and I should have let her stay stood in the car park when it was time to get in the car.

This morning she has repeatedly thrown rediculous tantrums when she hasnt got her own way. She is now in her bedroom while we both calm down. I love her to pieces, I really do, but I am left wondering where on earth I went wrong with her.